Yet Again

The closest I have ever seen an eagle since my arrival in Juneau in early January.  This beautiful bird was about 15 feet directly above me at a beach area close to my house.

At 6:30 this morning I was woken up by the sound of strong rain and even stronger winds howling outside.  I could hear branches crashing against the tin roof of the house, and I looked out the window to see all of the very tall pine trees that surround my house bending precariously in the very strong winds.  I knew that it was going to be a raw, cold and wet day.

By mid-morning I was suffering from cabin fever, and even though it was cold, windy and wet, decided that I needed to go......somewhere.  After getting dressed (including two pairs of socks after my frozen toe experience of yesterday) I grabbed my pack and car keys and headed for the beach about 4 miles from the house.  When I arrived, the beach was empty and I wandered aimlessly along the beach, lost in introspection.  Far too much introspection these days.......

As I was picking up shells to add to my blue-shell-collection I saw something in the water.  It was a bird with a white head, I thought at first it was a seagull, and he was about a football field away from me.  I watched him only half-interested while he was head-bobbing, and then I realized that he was swimming towards the beach. 

I continued to watch him swimming towards shore, and as he got closer to shore, and as I got closer to him, I realized that he was not a seagull at all - that he was an eagle.

I stopped moving, and reached into my pocket for my camera. 

Finally he reached shore and walked out of the water.  I was still quite a ways from him, so couldn't tell what he was carrying.  But as he stood there, and then continually reached down with his head to the ground I realized that he had a fish.  That he had caught a fish, swam it to shore, and that he was now taking his time and enjoying the fruits of his labor......

As I continued to watch him feeding, I slowly kept walking in his direction - taking pictures every 20 feet or so and trying hard not to startle him.

Finally when I was less than 40 feet or so from him he must have decided that I had gotten close enough.  He grabbed the remainder of the fish in his beak and took flight.

He took his fish into the pine trees along the beach, I'm sure thinking that he could enjoy the rest of his meal in the trees.

As I put my camera back into my pocket I heard a huge screech coming from the trees, and immediately afterwards saw three eagles coming out of that same clump of trees, and frantically flying around.  It seems that others wanted his meal as well.........

After considerable noise and lots of short bursts of flight, they all quickly flew across the parking lot to the trees on the other side of the driveway.  I could see two of the eagles standing on branches of trees about 20 feet apart from each other, screeching angrily at each other. 

I quickly walked away from the shoreline, up the hill and across the driveway so I could follow what was happening between these angry eagles, while at the same time calling my Mountain Boy to share what was happening.

The eagles screeched at each other - one wanting the fish and the other most definately not willing to give it up.

They flew down onto the ground - one protectively eating and the other insisting on getting a share.

Until eventually they took flight again.  The picture at the very top of this blog is of the one eagle who decided to remain in the area, and while I took pictures of him from a safe distance he continued to loudly express his upset and displeasure.  He was not a happy camper.  The entire episode lasted about 5 minutes and was the most outstanding episode I have seen to date from these wonderful, beautiful and iconic birds.  It made my outing into the cold very very worthwhile.

After leaving the beach I drove down to the Auke Bay Recreation Area.  Walking down the long staircase from the parking area to the beach, it was obvious that I was now in an open water area - the wind was very strong and very cold.  But the picnic shelter provided cover for a few minutes while I stood and decided what I was going to do now that I was there. 

This part of the recreation area is a very civilized outdoor experience - paved trail, fancy picnic shelter, semi-circular retaining walls, nice benches, even a huge fireplace.  I could imagine my and my Mountain Boy walking this area and then sitting by a fire and just talking......

And with breath-takingly beautiful views of mountains, islands and channel.  Yes.......I could imagine us spending some time here in this wholly civilized outdoor experience.

I often look at these pictures that I take, and I very often realize that my little digital camera can never do SE Alaska justice.  The pictures are nice.  Sometimes they are even beautiful.  But this camera (as much as I love it because my oldest son gave to me) can never ever ever be able to truly capture the scope of the natural wonder of this place. 

And I look at the mountains in these pictures, and I know that they show one layer of mountains.  And that there are multiple layers of mountains that appear and disappear depending on how high or low or how dense the fog and clouds are,   On a clear day you can see forever.........

Even though it was very windy, I put on my gloves and pulled up the hood of my jacket and walked along the shoreline instead of walking on the paved trail - hoping to reach the clump of trees at the point. 

After walking for a while, taking pictures, wallowing in introspection still more, I realized that I would not be able to walk along the shore to the point - that I would run out of shoreline before then. 

I turned back, determined to find another way to get to that point.  The furthest most place on this beach.

Yesterday I needed to drive to the furthest most point of paved road.  There's deep meaning to that current need and desire I am sure...........

After some searching I found a trail that led to the point.......

Until I actually walked to and then saw this point, I did not realize that I had been to this place before.

A few days after I arrived in Juneau, my then room-mate gave me directions to the closest trail.  I walked that trail alone and greatly enjoyed the entire experience. 

The point I reached today was the same point that I reached on that day almost 3 months ago.  It was just as cold and windy on that day months ago, as it was today.  The two trails obviously connect with each other somewhere, and I just did not realize it until I revisited the point this morning.

I remember months ago wondering if the sky was big enough, if this place was open enough, if me and my Mountain Boy could move to this place, be happy here and make a life with each other here.

Months ago I was hopeful and believed that we could.  I was filled with quiet concern, but also cautious optimism. 

And now I am not so sure.

Yet again we thought that we had our house in Tennessee sold.  A private sale.  This was supposed to be the last visit to the house - money secured, good-to-go.  And he never showed up.  And he never called.  And we are back to square one.  Again.

Yet again the unresolved issues with work have arisen - still unresolved and even more pressing.  Right now I don't know where life will take us.  And two restless wolves continue to pace back and forth in their cages 4000 miles apart.  Yet again.

This last picture is a wonderful picture I think.  Rugged water, rugged mountains, rugged weather.  And something almost alter-like in the rock tower built at some time in the recent past by another visitor to the point at the beach.